it's more awkward

this morning i dropped matt and beatrix off at school and micah, penelope and i were left alone. while i was changing penelope in the back of the car micah was watching me and he asked, "mommy what is that white stuff all over her penis?" 

i laughed and said, "she doesn't have a penis silly, she's a girl. and that's diaper cream" 

he said, "oh yeah. what's that girl part called again?" 

i thought to myself, really?! we are going to have this discussion now? well, alright. i can roll with this. "on a girl it is called a vagina." 

"a bagina? hahaha! that's funny. bagina"

"no honey. V-agina. with a V."

"ooooh. vagina. va-gi-na. that's a three syllable word."

"yep. it sure is." i finished putting the diaper on penelope and was starting to ask him if he was ready to go. and then i heard him softly muttering the words to himself. 

he said..."peeeenis.     vaaaaaagina.    i like penis better."

"oh micah. they are both fine words."

"no mama. vagina is just more awkward."

laughing i replied. "yes it is honey. yes it is." 

his list

micah is off of school this week and doesn't start summer camp until next week, so that means we have a whole week of mornings that beatrix is in school and it is "mostly" just he and i. last week i asked him to make a list of some things that he would like to do together. i didn't really think he heard me, but 5 minutes later he came out of his room with a completed list. number 5 was erased because we "can go swimming anytime."

list of stuff to do 

1 fishing

2 silet speed ball

3 walk

4 woch a movey

6 play hibe the pencil

7 draw

8 pant

9 play with legos

10 play hide and seek

11 tell storys

12 draw father's Day card

as you can see number one on the list was fishing.

 this morning, bright and early, he asked me if we could go today. i put him off by replying with "let me think about it." on the way to drop matt and bea off he asked again and i said another quick "we'll see". on the way home he asked me a third time and everything in me wanted to list the millions of reason why it wouldn't work out to go this morning. but i put those aside and said, "ok. we can go fishing. but we only have an hour." he replied with a hearty "yipee!" while i was feeding penelope {i think every sentence for the last 5 months starts out with me saying, while i was feeding penelope!} anyway, while i was feeding penelope he got his fishing pole out of the garage, along with a fake lizard for bait and a bucket, "in case we catch a huge one mama!" we walked over to the lake and he got to work casting his line and i sat on a bench, taking pictures and drinking coffee. it was a wonderful and very relaxing way to spend an hour this morning. 

we remember

class of 2012

matt has been teaching at trinity christian academy for 6 years now. sigh... six. years.  that is crazy! 

thursday night was his 6th graduation. i have been at every one of them too. it's kind of a pseudo date night, but more importantly i love going because of the things that the kids say in their speeches. every year at least one of them has mentioned matt and the impact he has had on their lives. i love to hear these stories. i love seeing the way they hug him afterwards and tell him thank you. i love seeing past students and hearing their stories and how much matt helped them get through college. i love when the parents of these kids realize who my husband is and rave about him to me. i absolutely love seeing, and hearing and witnessing the difference matt is making. i feel a part of it too. before graduation actually started i ducked out to nurse my other date, penelope. over the 6 years there have been 3 graduations where babies or young toddlers have joined us on this night, and 2012 was one of those nights. she did a great job and sat, for the most part pretty quietly. she even fell asleep for a bit of it, and than the clapping and cheering started and her little eyes were wide with wonder. 

 this year was extra special. matt has had some students graduate over the years that we still keep in contact with, very special students that we have enjoyed getting to know as adults. it will be fun to go to their weddings and get announcements for their babies in the future. but this year, matt had a "daughter" graduate. a student who at the end of her freshman year almost dropped out. matt received a call from her mother asking for some help and help he did. not only did matt help her get through school but he also filled a bit of a father role in her life, one that she desperately needed. 

 these two are, to quote forrest, "peas and carrots". i know he was proud watching her walk across that stage, but there was a sadness there on his face, a soberness that comes when you know a time has passed and nothing but the unknown is before you. she is moving. with her mother to montana this summer. her mother is moving there to be closer to her parents and M is enrolled at the university of montana for the fall. this is one of the hard parts about teaching, they do eventually graduate and move on. they don't mean to move on, but it's natural and the busyness of life happens, and well, it is never the same. 

she smiled big like this all night. 

she deserved to smile. only smiles on a special night like this. 

the tears can always come later. we will miss her. 

chick-fil-a

 wednesday was micah's last day of first grade and matt's last day of classes. they always have parties on the last day of school and matt's homeroom brought chick-fil-a sandwiches. i guess there were quite a few left over and so they gave matt 5 of them to bring home. matt got penelope out of the car when we got home. i was following behind him and hadn't seen where he had placed all of the sandwiches. i got inside the house and saw that he had put them in pip's carseat. i had to grab my camera cause she looked adorable all covered in sandwiches, chomping on the package. it looked like she couldn't wait to have one of them for herself. 

little duck

some exercise

 last saturday i couldn't take it anymore...i HAD to work in our yard! but see that cute little bundle with the hat on? the one on my back? well, she won't let me have more than 20 minutes to myself during the day so i strapped her on my back, threw sunscreen on us both, and headed out to mow the lawn and do some other things around the house outside. it was warm out, but there was a lovely breeze. matt showed me how to start the mower and not even 5 minutes into it she was sound asleep. she stayed asleep for the whole hour it took me to mow. it was a great workout and i finally was able to work in my yard. a win win!

mother's day

mother's day started for me last friday. micah got home from school and proceeded to spend the rest of the afternoon and early evening in his room. i was given strict orders to not come anywhere near it. a couple of times he emerged to ask me questions. one time he came out and said, "mommy, can plants have drinking water? not that i have a plant or anything, but i'm just wondering." i smiled to myself and said, "yes, they can have drinking water." he disappeared again, only to return a minute later. "mommy, umm just another question...can plants have water from the pink bathroom?" he asked innocently.  i tried my hardest not to laugh and i said, "yes. the water from the pink bathroom is fine."  later on that evening he came into the kitchen acting all coy and nonchalant. "mama, where is the ribbon? i just need to know. for no reason." i told him where it was. then he came back with 4 different ones in his hand. "which one is your favorite?" i told him i liked the purple one. later as i was folding clothes on the couch he came and asked, "what about the brown one with pink flowers?" "i like that one too honey!" he grinned at me and than said, "i was just curious." a couple minutes later he asked me, "what about the white ribbon mommy? do you like the white ribbon?" i smiled at him this time. and he said, "whaaat? i was just wondering." i chuckled and told him that the white one was very pretty too. after baths and stories were read by daddy, i was making my way to bea and micah's rooms to kiss them goodnight and to pray. while i was in bea's room he yelled, "don't come in here!" i stood at his door and said "if i promise not to look around can i come in and give you a kiss?" he agreed to that. later that night matt told me that micah had made all of the mother's day decorations himself and that he and micah could hardly wait for sunday morning. 

sunday morning i was told to stay in bed until they came and got me. i was more than happy to obey! i was retrieved by a grinning micah and beatrix and lead to the dinning room where a pile of beautiful cards and a present were waiting for me. i looked at the wall and one of the most beautiful banners i have ever seen was taped to the wall with white ribbon...i got a little misty when i saw that. sigh...so special. 

 matt surprised me with a mother's ring. when i opened it and saw that he had gotten four stones, i looked across the table at him and we both had tears in our eyes. so special to have my four babies represented on something that i can wear everyday. it was incredibly thoughtful on his part. finn's stone is the red ruby...the darkest of all of them. micah's, beatrix's and penelope's are light and almost see through. i told matt later that morning that it looked like the light in finn's stone had gone out...matt said that when he saw it he thought it looked deep. like finn had deepened us, brought us depth. beautiful. 

 micah had been working on this plant at school for almost a month. 

sadly it died this last week. 

from over watering. ; ) 

matt had also bought krispie creme donuts, an indulgence that only makes it into our home once a year and one that the kids were very excited about. and i also got a delicious cup of coffee and an omelette. we went to church and had a very relaxing afternoon. life returned to normal after naps, but the morning had been incredibly relaxing and i felt very loved and honored. i am so thankful to be a mother. something i honestly never thought i would be when i was younger. and here i am today with 3 babies to look at, hold, hug and kiss everyday and one who is in heaven waiting for me. 

sunrise hot air balloons

one of the benefits of making 4 runs out of the house every day is that i get to listen to a lot of radio. i have never been so "informed"! haha one day last week, i heard on the radio that there was going to be a hot air balloon festival. i took note of the name of it and when i got home i googled it to get more information. what i found out was that on saturday morning, they were planning a mass assention of the balloons at sunrise! i thought it would be pretty awesome and so i texted several of our friends and said, "if you would like an adventure, meet at our house at 5:30 saturday morning with a picnic breakfast, blanket and $5 donation." they had no idea what i was planning. saturday dawned clear and as i was loading my very sleepy family into our car i said a silent prayer that it would be fun and everyone would be glad they had come. 

 we spread out our blankets and waited in anticipation. i had made lemon muffins and carrot cake to share. a bribe if you will.

 micah took this picture. he has been into borrowing my camera lately. once in awhile he takes a really amazing one. the two fires are at the top of the balloon baskets. it is what heats the air so that they rise.

 we patiently waited an hour and half. when a lady finally came on the loud speaker and announced that the balloons were not going to be able to go up that morning due to winds, we were all disappointed. as we were watching though, two vans drove into the middle of the field and began inflating two balloons. they did it to show eveyone who had waited what the balloons looked like. nicole and her boyfriend daniel walked the kids down to watch close up.

 greg and matt kept joking that they were going to get the college where they both work, PBA, to purchase a hot air balloon. and they would be in charge of taking it around the country to advertise for the school. they joked about it, but i thought it was actually a good marketing idea. there are not too many colleges out there that would use a hot air balloon to advertise.

 it was a really fun morning. i have to admit i got a little teary eyed when we got out of our car and were greeted at 6:00 in the morning by some of our best friends. it was a great way to start the day.